jacktellslies (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
jacktellslies) wrote2009-02-12 12:40 pm
jacktellslies) wrote2009-02-12 12:40 pm
Entry tags:
Flirting.
I'm told it's nearly Valentine's day. In that case, some of you may find the following information useful.
The confused and frightened men who fall into my store near the fourteenth often gravitate towards my case, desperate to appease the womenfolk with dead things dragged from the depths. They frequently choose sea scallops. They are correct.
My sea scallops are hand-caught by divers. Someone sunk down, searching amongst the dead things and the swimming things. They returned with a bright shell with something living and soft inside, something that you may present to your lover. The modern world is not known for such luxuries.
Besides being quite romantic, diver-caught shellfish involves a minimum of environmental impact. The sea floor is left as it belongs. Once again, the alternative is dredging.
When selecting scallops, you want to be sure that they are dry. Dry is the term used to indicate that they are neither bleached nor inflated with chemicals to appear to be larger than they are. If you distrust the word of your fishmonger (as, really, you ought) colouring is a good test. If every sea scallop is white, suspect unnatural influence. You want a variety of colours, mostly white, but some brown or even orange. Difference in colour implies no difference in flavour.
The darker ones are female. Some of the white ones are, too, but the darker colour indicates that they are or were recently ovulating. They soak in their own juices, absorbing them, thus succumbing to an aroused blush. Delicious.
The confused and frightened men who fall into my store near the fourteenth often gravitate towards my case, desperate to appease the womenfolk with dead things dragged from the depths. They frequently choose sea scallops. They are correct.
My sea scallops are hand-caught by divers. Someone sunk down, searching amongst the dead things and the swimming things. They returned with a bright shell with something living and soft inside, something that you may present to your lover. The modern world is not known for such luxuries.
Besides being quite romantic, diver-caught shellfish involves a minimum of environmental impact. The sea floor is left as it belongs. Once again, the alternative is dredging.
When selecting scallops, you want to be sure that they are dry. Dry is the term used to indicate that they are neither bleached nor inflated with chemicals to appear to be larger than they are. If you distrust the word of your fishmonger (as, really, you ought) colouring is a good test. If every sea scallop is white, suspect unnatural influence. You want a variety of colours, mostly white, but some brown or even orange. Difference in colour implies no difference in flavour.
The darker ones are female. Some of the white ones are, too, but the darker colour indicates that they are or were recently ovulating. They soak in their own juices, absorbing them, thus succumbing to an aroused blush. Delicious.
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and oh! how to cook a wolf? i must read this woman.
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Please have more sex more responsibly. Thank you.
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