cheers, queers.

[jacktellslies]

i'm not very good at being out, but i like the idea. what i mean is, i don't care who knows how i vote, where i'm pierced, who i fuck, or what i keep in the hat box next to my bed, but i'm not good at talking to strangers, or the introductory sexual category conversation expected when sniffing out one's new, seemingly less than hetero acquaintances. at work, everyone knows that i like girls, and i've had conversations about former boyfriends with a good many of them. but everyone seems to think that i'm a lesbian. this is mostly my fault for not correcting them and being prepared to define terms. but it seems like a daunting task. if they can't handle bisexuality, how do i explain why it doesn't apply? it seems like by now we shouldn't have to explain that sometimes girls are boys so that we can explain that alternate pronouns exist so that we can suggest that maybe we'd sort of be happier if people wouldn't mind using them when speaking about us. my family is relatively aware of the fact that i've never been very good at discriminating based on gender when it comes to partners. but we've never had a conversation about what i'd like for that to be called. when queer eye exploded into the world, my sister was surprised by the name. she'd never heard queer used as anything but an insult. it's what i call myself. why hadn't i told her? why didn't she know? is it just me? am i the only one who is really bad at this? or are we collectively failing to teach the world our language? and, beyond printing one and a quarter inch manifestos on buttons, how do i fix that?

Comments

[lezgonow349.livejournal.com]

i love you, my fabulously queer friend!

[earlofgrey.livejournal.com]

hee. thanks, dude. you're rad to the max.

[lezgonow349.livejournal.com]

neat!

:-D

[crushablepink.livejournal.com]

its all about categories- we sort according to what we know. if we dont know theres a new category, we cant sort things into it. so yes, you need to spread the gospel.

[wireworkelf.livejournal.com]

We're all a little afraid, and all a little unsure, and not many of us at all are good at talking about these things. I got the easy way out, being of a socially-acceptable sexual persuasion and identity. But I like to listen, and I want to understand, and I'd like to think I'm not the only one.

<3

[poetic-frog.livejournal.com]

I'm going to say this, as an example of the semantics in my life.
I was called bisexual the other day. I was insulted, not because I don't like both sexes, but because to me, in my circles, the word was always used as an insult for someone who was trying to be cool or couldn't make up their mind. Somewhere I've picked up a superiority complex to that word. Not that I have another that works, but there you go.
And I love you. In a weird never really met you way.

[earlofgrey.livejournal.com]

i'm worried that i sort of feel the same way. i mean, my main reason for not using the term is that people i like come in way more categories than just two genders can describe. but there is the part of me that still thinks of bisexual as meaning seventeen year old girly girl kissing other girls at parties to get boys. and that is so lame of me.

i love you too. and i'm sad that we haven't met yet.