Alaska.

My dear friends Meredith and Alex were kind enough to call me from Alaska, where they're off adventuring. They found three things there that they said reminded them of me, and I hope they don't mind if I note those things here.

1. An Alaskan dandy. I really can't tell you how pleased I am to learn that at least one exists.

2. Someone riding a penny-farthing! Again, Alaska is a magnificent place if all I've heard is to be believed, but it's slightly better for the knowledge that at this very moment, someone could be riding a completely unreasonable bicycle there.

3. A bear masturbating. Ahem. It was at the zoo, tugging on its toes with one paw, and with the other abusing itself with ursine ferocity. Listen, if any of you ever see a bear masturbating and don't think of me immediately, I'll be severely disappointed. I think. A kindergarten class watched the festivities, and one of the children exclaimed, "Hey! That's that thing my dad taught me about!" Ah, youth.

~~~

One of my coworkers plans to visit Alaska next summer. I told him of my plans in Ireland, that I hope to sleep on fairy mounds, that I want to touch a thousand dolmens. He understands, longing to sleep in Alaskan caves himself. "To dream you're in the belly of a whale?" I asked him.

"To sing songs about it," he affirmed, "to write songs about it."

I smiled. "To let the cave sing those songs to you."

"Yes! It'll be volcanic fumes; I'll be the next great oracle."

We laughed. "You delinquents and prophets, always high on that crazy cave dope."

I hear that most jobs aren't like this. Pity.