the day of awesome.

[jacktellslies]

before i begin, it should be noted that yesterday, kaitlin referred to my breasts as "stealthy". i approve in all ways. also, she and i talk about each others breasts a lot. i just noticed. honestly, kaitlin, can we just get drunk and make out already? we many now continue.

set: the philadelphia zoo. the stage should be set in such a way that frequently reminds the audience that sometimes, fiction is not real.

soundtrack: avenue q and wicked, in the car.

the players:

• mr. p. dreadful: a fop.
• mistress liz: an empress. she likes to say random, individual phrases or words in french for no apparent reason. a self-described drama queen, she is neat beyond reason.
• patrick: a puppeteer. the only straight male theatre major ever. awesome in all ways.
• chad and louie: puppets. chad is yellow. louie is a lazy blues singer.
• the emus: they recently broke up with their girlfriends. no one understands. sigh.
• the leopard: paces. foils the leads rather more easily than they'd like to admit.
• the lions: aslan, and, apparently, the former cast of rosanne.
• the vampire bats: sinister. they keep large bowls of blood in their dwelling. mr. dreadful claims to do the same, but the audience should not believe zir.
• most small rodent things: wonderful. some will interact with the main characters and their puppets in a playful manner.
• mole rats: not naked, or fans of cheese. prudes.
• bears and foxes: present.
• wolves: very unfortunately absent.
• a shrew: tamed.
• flamingos: croquet. very funny.
• the orangutans: the librarian.
• a small monkey: depressed.
• a giant centipede: not a small mammal.
• some monkeys: want the cup. must get the cup. sometimes drop the cup.
• baby anythings: socute.
• all others: neat. neat, neat, neat.

plot synopsis: it is discovered that when two theatre majors and a fool are unleashed upon a zoo, they will imitate the animals' behavior a lot. (hey, look, i'm a flamingo.) patrick's car is broken into, but nothing much is taken; the goodness of the universe is proven, as is the fact that people who break into cars won't steal your cds if you only listen to musicals and emo. the leads obtain yummy food, but no jewish apple cake, and return to mr. dreadful's house to watch the beginning of hook. it is decided that liz's peter pan story should actually be about the fact that peter apparently only kidnaps the children of american tourists lost in kensington gardens. this would explain most of the films made on the subject. finis.

Comments

[autodidactic.livejournal.com]

That sounds like the guest list for the best party in the world.

A.

[whatifilied.livejournal.com]

it was!

[earlofgrey.livejournal.com]

*laughs* exactly. add some alcohol, cigarettes, and raw meat, and we're set.

[randiriel.livejournal.com]

Ever so fabulous. Zoos are so much fun.

[kreuzvorabaddon.livejournal.com]

I dunno why...but that whole set up intrigues me greatly...that actually sounds like a doable stage play that could make the audience laugh their asses of...I dunno why that struck me as that....ta-ta

[whatifilied.livejournal.com]

also, the so-called cheetah you refer to was a leopard. The cheetahs were later and were not fast.

[earlofgrey.livejournal.com]

it was amazing! i forgot to say that there was a gigantic hot air balloon there, but it was all alone and tied down. we freed it and flew to tibet. when we were arrested for stealing the balloon, we defended ourselves in court. our argument was that the balloon was sad. we went to jail, but it was worth it, because that's just a great story.

[earlofgrey.livejournal.com]

*laughs* hm... maybe i should write a real play...

[earlofgrey.livejournal.com]

bah! foolish me. i'll have to hang out with allyson more often when she's learning animal names.

[randiriel.livejournal.com]

Yes. Yes it is.

How was Tibet?

[swirl-girlx.livejournal.com]

cutest. post. ever.
*tips her hat to you*

[saltedeyes.livejournal.com]

haha loved this post.
and that would be an awesome peter pan story! hehe.

[earlofgrey.livejournal.com]

amazing! i shall live there one day, i think.

[earlofgrey.livejournal.com]

hee! thanks bunches, lady. :D

[earlofgrey.livejournal.com]

thanks!

*laughs* totally.

[spanishdoll23.livejournal.com]

I am in love with this post. I am adding it to my memories because it = awesome.

[earlofgrey.livejournal.com]

aww, hooray!

[randiriel.livejournal.com]

I should like to live there with you. Or, at least, visit you there. I think I would adore Tibet.

[earlofgrey.livejournal.com]

we shall go, you and i. i don't think i'll live there terribly long, so it will be more like an extended visit.

[randiriel.livejournal.com]

Yes. Excellent. Extended visit sounds like just the right length.

[earlofgrey.livejournal.com]

very good. *readies the balloon*

[randiriel.livejournal.com]

There is a children's book, I think it's called 21 Balloons, and if you haven't read it, I insist you do.

[earlofgrey.livejournal.com]

what is it about?

[randiriel.livejournal.com]

It's been so long since I've read it, I can't be sure. There is a lot of hot-air balloons, and a secret island, and it is fabulous. That I do know.

[spanishdoll23.livejournal.com]

You've never read 21 balloons?!?!?! *shock* *horror*

It is a BRILLIANT children's book.

Which - I own. And I shall lend it to you. So, you maty rejoice in the awesome.

It is about Krakatoa. Sort of.
There is an island.
And strandedness.
Anmd awesome love.
And remote island civilization coolness.
And balloons.
And volcanoes.

Also, there are diamonds.

You MUST read it.

[earlofgrey.livejournal.com]

*swoon* i'm dedicating this summer to reading everything you want me to read.